Chasing my own tail?

It is really funny to watch a cat chase it's tail...not so funny when it's me.

My days are the same, everyday the same. I am okay with it most of the time. But sometimes, it makes me crazy.

Like when you clean the house...

You clean one room, go onto the next, come back into the first and think to yourself, "Did I not just spend and hour, maybe two cleaning?"

As far as kids bedrooms go, I think there should be an unwritten law: Close the door so nobody sees inside until you are old enough to keep it clean yourself.

Simple and saves me the hassle...yeah right, if only!

Then, there are pillows! The pillows for our couches spend more time on the floor than they do on the couch. Every time, you walk through the living room you bend over pick them up go up stairs or wherever you were headed come back and there they are...on the floor again! Then, you think to yourself, "Did I not just pick these up the last time I walked through?"

The cat litter box...Why is it that the minute I put the lid back on after cleaning it a cat has to go take care of business. Never fails, every time! Around and around we go!

Oh, and should I dare talk about the bathroom? I get the most frustrated with this room! There are days when my lungs are burning from the bleach smell! Finally, it is clean then wouldn't you know...someone's gotta go!

I remember when I first started blogging I said I should have named my blog, "Will my bathroom ever be clean again?" now I am thinking it should be...

"When will the hole on the toilet be big enough?" or

"If you can't make it in the hole, please, sit down!"

The list could go on...

"Does anyone but mom know where the hamper is?"

"Is it really necessary to hit your brother as you walk by?"

"How many times do I have to tell you not to climb on the counter?"

"Go sit in your bed and don't come down until you are ready to behave!"

"Stop slamming doors before someone loses a finger!"

"Can we please enjoy a meal without the arguing?"

"When will I learn that if the kids are quiet, it's not a good thing!?!?"

or we could go with, simply...

"Now, what's broken?"

because when I call Bill at work that is usually the first thing that comes out of his mouth!

Family tree

Why is it so hard for kids to understand? I don't know if its all kids or just mine. But trying to figure out the concept of a family tree gets them every time.

I dread when they start questioning things.

Having a blended family brings up a lot of questions. I remember Jacob asking Jenna if her dad died because in his young mind none of it made sense. How was she his sister? Why was she calling his dad "dad"? Who was her mom?

Poor Isaiah thinks that when you grow up you either become a mom or dad. Sounds right?!? Not exactly! He insists that he is going to be the dad and either Joshua or Jacob are going to be the mom. Because he is not going to be the one who turns into a girl! Then when they try to tell him they will all have their own wives, he gets upset, "MOM! Tell them I am going to be the dad!" It's impossible...he'll get it soon enough.

When Tyler said to Isaiah, "When I have a kid..." I said, "In twenty years, right?"..."You will be an uncle." "NO! I AM NOT GOING TO BE A GIRL!" "An uncle is a boy, an aunt is a girl" "MMMOOMMM!, Tell him!"

Simple concept? Not really! Something tells me he doesn't want to be a girl :)

I remember when they asked me who my mom and dad were. I told them grandma and grandpa. They didn't get that at first either. For some reason, Bill was supposed to be my dad because he is their dad. It seems so simple but I guess in their minds it didn't make sense.

But all those questions were simple compared to what Joshua asked this weekend, "Mom, I know that I am your kid because I came out of your belly but how can I be dad's?"

Ummm...Bill,

Joshua has a question for you!

"You're a classroom celebrity"

Today, when I got to Joshua's class to help the kids his teacher came out to the hall to tell me I was a "classroom celebrity." She heard all about Joshua's party. I told her there was one point during the party I told them I was going to have her come over to keep them in line because she lives around the corner. She said I should have! She is a really good teacher. I think I have said it before but I will say it again, teachers are very special people and they do not get the respect they deserve. I am guilty, I never realized what they did until I volunteered as much as I do. I told Bill they should put me on payroll. He said, "Why? Then, you wouldn't enjoy it as much." He's right. I am glad I get a chance to be in the school with my kids.

Anyway, back to Joshua's teacher, she said this weekend she had her dads 88th birthday party and they put 88 candles on the cake! She showed me the picture. I told her she is lucky I am not going to have a first grader next year or I would bring her a cake with a lot of candles on it!

And, since we are talking kids, have you ever wanted to bottle giggles. I love to hear kids giggle. you know, the giggle when they are watching Tom and Jerry and they don't realize you are listening. If there was a way to bottle it and open it years later just to hear them giggle again. You would never be sad, if you felt a sad moment coming on you would just open the bottle. Who doesn't smile at the sound of a happy kid? It's those little things that you miss.

And, since we are talking about missing things, lately people have been telling me about things I am going to miss. Giggles and hugs and kisses, I will miss. But, when you tell me I am going to miss the fighting and bickering and arguing, I am not so sure. Getting notes like this...

you can bet I'll miss!

(Bill wants to know why he is an after thought though?)

HAPPY 7th BIRTHDAY JOSHUA!

Today, Joshua turns seven...

I remember that week like it was yesterday. We were moving into our house, buying a car, and had a baby.

We love you Joshua.

10 years later...

Yesterday, our pastor said, "I can tell you, this man loves this woman." I know Bill loves me but to hear someone else say it, it has a different meaning.

I didn't do anything to deserve him but I am glad God sent him my way...

I love you, Sherry,

and I know that God has brought us together.

Because of this,

I desire to be your husband and best friend, always.

Together we will serve Him in accordance with His plan,

so that in all areas of our life Christ will be evident.

Through the pressures of the present and the uncertainties of the future,

I promise to be faithful to you.

There will be no other.

I promise to always forgive you no matter what you have done,

so that nothing will ever separate us.

I promise to love, guide, and protect you as Christ does His Church,

as long as we both are alive.

According to Ephesians 5 and with His enabling power,

I promise to strive to show to you the same kind of love, on a daily basis,

as Christ showed the Church when He died for her,

and to love you as a part of myself because in His sight we are one.

If you were to tell me ten years ago I would be standing here renewing my wedding vows, I wouldn’t have believed you. But I stand here today with you, my best friend, in front of our friends and family to rededicate our marriage. You have changed my life and made me complete. I am a better person because of you. I have learned how to love and be loved. I have learned to believe in myself. I have been blessed with the gift of our children and felt the happiness of being a mother. I have the honor of raising our children with you. The past ten years have brought more joy I could have ever imagined and I look forward to making many more memories. They have also brought some of the worst pain that I have ever felt and never thought I could bear. But I stand here today because you stood by me. You held my hand, you lifted me up, you let me cry, and pulled me through. I don’t know what this life has yet to bring us but I know that as long as you are by my side we will make it through. I promise to walk with you for the rest of my life. I promise to be faithful to you. I promise to be there for you whenever you need me. I will hold your hand through the hard times. I will rejoice with you in the happy times. I thank God for leading me to that little church where we met. I also thank Him because there are no coincidences we were meant to be and I know that as long as we walk together with Him this marriage will last forever.

Finally...

I can't say that I was doing everything right. I knew there was still a lot more to change. I still had a lot of pride to swallow and huddles to get over. I was broken. I believe I was right where God wanted me. Sometimes when I look back I can't even imagine what I was doing and thinking. I remember wanting to do it my way. But, my way led to one dead end after the other. Finally, after swallowing my pride, I moved back home. I couldn't keep living my life wrong and expect God to bless me.

I remember Mandy bought me a bible for my birthday that year. I carried that bible with me to work! We even tried starting a bible study before work. People must have thought I went off the deep end, all of the sudden I was a "Jesus freak!" That new christian feeling lasts for a little while, but it wears off. But the feeling of knowing your life is different doesn't.

I continued to go to church. I stayed involved. I knew I was there for a reason. I looked at my life and I knew that I someday wanted to be married but I didn't see it happening anytime soon. My dad liked to use his "prophecy" skills and would often say I was going to meet that certain someone in church. He would even throw in a "and he is going to have dark hair and brown eyes." I just laughed.

Time passed and I found the answer to the age long question...

Is the way to a man's heart really through is stomach?

Yes, it is!

I remember the first time I saw Bill Looman. My heart skipped a beat! There was no way he was the one for me. As he sang, Sunday after Sunday, I just admired him from a distance. My sister often said he reminded her of Tim McGraw and if you know Mandy you know how she "loved" Tim. Mandy, you silly girl, I don't stand a chance with him! Stop it, this is not why we go to church!

One Sunday, I made cookies for after the service. And that is when it happened. I heard him asking who made the cookies. I can not even tell you how excited I was! Fumbling for words, as I said it was me. He liked my cookies! This means something! Will I make you some more, you bet I will! He didn't have brown eyes but they were close enough!

Bill and I have come a long way since the day I told Mandy that he asked me out and she did a cartwheel in the living room.

Did God lead me to that church?

Yes, he did!

Tomorrow, Bill and I celebrate ten years together. We have made it through some of the greatest times and some of the worst times of this life. I don't know what the future holds but I know I am going to walk through this life with my best friend. We will stand up to whatever life throws at us because as long as I have him I have everything I need.

Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken. Ecclesiastes 4:12

Next...

When you start going to back to church it can be overwhelming, there are so many of them. Where do you start?

Mandy and I went to that church for awhile. We didn't really feel a connection. Sunday after Sunday, we came and went. We didn't build relationships, we just attended. We weren't sure if it was the church for us.

Then one day, my cousin invited me to a Mary Kay party. I wasn't crazy about it because I am not really a big make up person. When she told me her pastor's wife was the consultant, I was even more hesitant. She wouldn't give up, so I gave in and went. I had a good time talking with some of the people from her church. When I was talking to the pastor's wife, she asked me where we were going to church. I explained to her that I was tired of going to a church for months and no one knew even our names. She invited us to her church the next morning. I told her I wasn't sure what I was going to do.

The next morning, I decided I would try her church. After all, it was five minutes from home and I didn't have to go back if I didn't like it. You can bet I did the same thing on the way to church. I tried to get out of it until the very last second, "God, if I walk in there and she doesn't remember my name, I AM NOT going back to this church!" Usually, I am sure God doesn't like ultimatums but He must have wanted me there. I walked in the door and Jan came up to me, hugged me, and said, "I am so glad you decided to come, Sherry." She remembered my name sometimes it's the little things that mean so much.

Her husband, Bob, was a very good pastor. He spoke about things that pertained to everyday life. He often would bring lawn mowers or various other power tools in to make his point. Every lesson had a prop and a good message behind it. I remember he said, "To solve a problem you must first eliminate the source." I don't know why, it seems so simple and it's common sense but I use it still. When I find myself trying to solve a problem, I now find myself wondering 'what is the source of this problem and how can I get rid of it?'

We got pretty involved in that church, Awana Clubs, Vacation Bible School, nursery, and even joined bible studies. It seemed as though I found a good church but, did God have more? Could it be that I was lead there for some reason I didn't know yet? I still wasn't sure what it was but I decided I liked that church and I was going to stay.

to be continued...